By Laura Walter

Roxann Edwards has been through breast cancer twice, both times exhausting. But she uses her voice to inspire others. “I can’t help anybody if I haven’t gone through anything!” the Camden resident quipped.

Every cancer case is different. But because Edwards had “no family history, no genetic markers—I will 100 percent says it’s environmental and stress and how extremely important it is for us to ensure we are taking care of our mental self, emotional self, spiritual, as well as physical. Because the dis-easements come into our body and just wreak havoc! ... I believe it all stems from that. We have to look at our bodies holistically.”

Her body had definitely done some work, including 22 years in the U.S. Air Force Reserves (retired master sergeant), deployed for Operations Desert Shield and Desert Storm and called up during 9/11, as the mother of two children under age 10.

“In 2002, I was going through a very difficult, emotionally traumatic divorce. My family doctor suggested, ‘Go get a baseline mammogram … you’re going through a very stressful time. It can wreak havoc on your body.’” Edwards delayed, thinking, ‘Oh, we don’t have any cancer in our family,’ as if it’s solely caused by genetics (it’s not).

“They found a lump in September. My divorce was final in September, and I had to hide that because my ex and I were fighting for custody … My kids didn’t even know” until a few years later.

She was diagnosed with ductal carcinoma in situ, on her right side, leading to a double lumpectomy and radiation. “I was an emotional wreck; thank God I was grounded spiritually.” Edwards only told certain people. Her mother drove to Delaware to help her and the kids during treatment.

Eventually Edwards healed and moved on with life. She became the museum studies program administrator at George Washington University. “Fascinating! … I was surprised at how much I was learning,” Edwards smiled, remembering her staff and students. “It was worth the commute!”

But that was a 2.5-hour commute for seven years. She worked nonstop, practically lived out of her car and ate as such. The job was great, but she wasn’t living healthfully.

In spring 2023, “I found a lump on the left side … and that is when my life changed because this diagnosis was metastatic, Stage 3. It had traveled to lymph nodes and other parts of the breast.”

She was diagnosed this time with metastatic stage 3 breast cancer: estrogen receptor (ER) positive, progesterone receptor (PR) positive, HER2-negative.

Incredibly, she was about 58 years old, versus 37 during the previous bout, meaning “it didn’t come back. If it’s within five years, it’s a come-back. This was new … this time I had to do chemo, then a double mastectomy, then radiation.”

She needed to take care of herself again because cancer is exhausting. “My advice to family is: show up, even when [we] tell you not to … We’re going to say, ‘I’m fine, I got this, you don’t need to come.’ COME! Go and physically see them, touch them, hold their hand, bring a flower.” Check the person’s laundry hamper, dishwasher or refrigerator and fill in the gaps, Edwards said. “It takes me three days to mop my kitchen floor because I’m exhausted.”

Drive that person to their next appointment, whether you attend the appointment or sit in the waiting room.“Knowing somebody has your back, whether you want them to be there or not—that is so important for family. My family just shows up, two hours from the D.C. metropolitan area, they just come. And that meant the world,” Edwards said. “We’re gonna push you away, but ignore us because we feel like—I didn’t want to be a burden on anybody … but we’re crying out on the inside. We wanna hear ‘I got you.’”

Today, Edwards is taking medication, eating healthy, healing from the cancer and dealing with other health issues, “but this too will pass,” Edwards said.

“I served 22 years in the military and 22 years in the post office, including 14 as Hartly postmaster. I said, ‘OK, Lord, I’m grateful, and now I wanna live!” Edwards laughed. “I fight every day to take care of my body and spread the word that you’re not in this journey alone … There’s so many wonderful people and agencies that are here to hold your hand!”

From support groups to food assistance, she appreciates the “phenomenal” nonprofits like her Bayhealth medical team, the Delaware Breast Cancer Coalition and Unite For HER, out of New Jersey.

“I’m a believer … God puts people in our lives to deal with the journey,” Edwards said. That includes wonderful neighbors, a devoted dog, a supportive church and close friends, who even helped her create the “Pinky Promise” support program. They hosted a Breast Cancer Awareness Support & Outreach event at Faith, Hope, and Love Christian Fellowship in Milford.

Edwards’ children are adults, she has two “lovely” grandchildren, and she loves crafting. She definitely enjoys joking around and speaking for a crowd. Perhaps an amateur comedy night is in her future. After all, sometimes you laugh so that you don’t cry.

“I’m bald now, I have no hair, I have no breasts, and you have to say, ‘It’s okay, because you’re still who you are on the inside’” she said. “I’m still here! And I’m so grateful!”

Editor's Note: The original version of this story had incorrectly stated Edwards' 2023 diagnosis, in the Greater Dover Independent (Oct. 3) and Daily State News (Oct. 6). We regret the error.