It was meant to be, guidance from heaven and certainly from his late mother, that he would go into business with Brian Howell, an experienced Baltimore-area funeral director, learn from him and continue in the family business.

Edwin Lashley Jolley is convinced of that. And, the son of  Patricia Jolley, owner of Jolley Memorial Chapel until her unexpected death in 2020,  is determined to continue making his mother, who he calls the most important woman in his life, proud.

Through the friendship, and business acumen of the men -- Howell & Jolley Memorial Chapel Funeral and Cremation Services was created, with a funeral home in Salisbury and one in Berlin -- Lashley wants to see rejuvenated. Lashley is President of the new company and Howell is CEO.

“My mother was a very spiritual person and close follower of Christ. I believe this was what my mother would want, what my grandmother would want. They would want me to have somebody to help our business grow and expand, someone to mentor me. After my mother died I was  thrown in the water, sink or swim. I’ve been swimming. I’ve been doing what I am capable of.

“Mr. Howell and I connected right away. A friend gave me his business card. We talked and I had a feeling it wasn’t going to be the last time we spoke, that we would end up working together somehow.  I reached out to him and he, with no hesitation, agreed to partner with me. I needed somebody to learn from, someone who could take me under his wing and teach me how to be a successful business person. He has had a good reputation serving his community  for so many years. I felt he was the perfect person to help our business grow,” Lashley said.

“I could not have found a better, well-educated young man than Mr. Lashley. He is going to be one of our finest funeral directors on the Shore because of his demeanor and his love for people,” said Howell, who has been in the funeral business in Baltimore since 1983. He worked under the leadership of the late Leroy Dyett, owner of the Leroy O. Dyett and Son Funeral Home in Northwest Baltimore. Dyett died in 1998 and Howell took over the next year. In 1999, the first funeral home was established by the Howell family in the Howard Park area of Baltimore City, according to the company Website.

In 2007, the business became the first black-owned family funeral home in Howard County.  In 2009, the family opened a third funeral home in East Baltimore community.

“Being born around the funeral business, you don’t think one day your family will move on and you will have to keep the legacy,” Lashley said, recalling his desire in his youth was to play professional basketball, after playing while studying at St. Joseph’s University in Philadelphia.

“I stayed with my mom because she was by herself after my stepfather died,” Lashley said. Jolley and her husband, Daniel Lee King, were married in 1994. He died in 2015.

“I spent a lot of time with my mother. In my mind I was thinking, ‘I’m just happy to be here.’ I had my man cave upstairs while she was downstairs. We had dinner together. The night she got sick, we had gone shopping together and we were watching our shows. That whole time I was like, ‘I’m glad I’m able to spend this time with my mother,.’ She died from a brain aneurysm,” he said.

Early on a Monday morning, around midnight, Jolley told her son she felt she needed emergency medical care. Her head ached and “things were spinning,” her son said.

“The first report wasn’t good. We were all in shock by that report because she walked to the ambulance herself. Even though she was sick, she walked halfway up the steps to yell to me to tell me she needed to go to the hospital. Then she lived three or four days before we had to say goodbye. I am a firm believer in Christ and that God was leading me in this direction,” he said about the family business.

After Patricia Jolley’s death, selling the business was never considered.

“Absolutely not. My family has worked too hard, going back to my grandfather in 1949 and my grandmother and my mother. My mother never pushed being a funeral director on me but working with this business helped me with my own grief. I lost the most important woman in my life, so when a family that loses a loved one and that family is grieving and comes to me, I can have a feeling and understanding of what they are going through. I went through it and I am going through it still. Being able to give back and give families a sense of peace during a time like that is very rewarding to me,” he said.

Lashley is continuing to study mortuary science, taking courses including chemistry, business, accounting, cosmetics and restorative art.

Howell, who will look for a  home on the Eastern Shore, has a brother, Willie Howell, who is also a licensed mortician and who will work in Baltimore more than Howell will, now that he is involved with Jolley. To be a successful funeral director, Howell said, one must have patience and “a love of what you do.”

Rachel Gully, licensed supervisor at Howell & Jolley, agreed.

“I think patience certainly is key. You have to have a passion for it, to be able to connect with families and all kinds of responses. Sometimes people are angry and you have to be able to take that and not take it personally. I think patience is important and compassion is important, being grounded in a sense of what is right and of doing the right thing. The profit will come. If  you are treating people well, the profit will follow. And prayer. For me, I can’t come to this business and be involved without having a somewhat decent prayer life. Even though we don’t market ourselves as a ministry, we really truly are. We are ministering to people at the worst moment of their lives so we have to go out of our own fleshly desire. You have to have something spiritually so you can comfort people,” she said.

“When a person dies, they are in business mode. They haven’t had time to grieve. You are dealing with them on a business level but you also have to be able to minister to that spirit,” she said.

The funeral home has a custom of staying in touch with families after funerals and checking on them. We make sure they know we are here. We become part of their support system and we reach out to them,” she continued.

Agreeing, Lashley said the funeral business can take its toll, making it necessary to find time to relax “and take care of your mental health.”

It was Lashley’s grandfather who started the Thornton Jolley Funeral Home in 1949, succeeding the Stewart Funeral Home that dated back to 1909. In 1947 the name was changed. Lashley’s grandfather died suddenly, leaving his widow, Loretta, to take over the business until her death in 2017. Patricia Jolley received her license in 1979 and worked with her mother. They were unique in being not only owned by African Americans, but run by women.

Today, there are 16 employees and about 85 funerals each year.

Lashley said his mother always told him he was smarter than he thought, and he is proud to be carrying a  3.79 grade point average in mortuary school.

“I never imagined getting grades like that especially in science but I’ve been able to get A’s in science, chemistry, all these high classes. I put all the time and effort in. My mother always said if  I would just apply myself,” he said, recalling his childhood, being a boy in his grandmother’s house where there was a prep room for the deceased and a chapel and where he, a young man with a skateboard, was never bothered by the surroundings.

“There is no way I could have done this by myself,” he  said.

“It’s God. Our business could easily not have been here anymore. Now we are in a good position to grow and I can learn. Without Mr. Howell,  I might not have had anyone to learn from. I might have had to learn on my own,” he said.

Howell Jolley is interested in expanding its business and handling more funerals each year, Gulley said.

“Pat was doing it as a one-woman operation. This is a great opportunity for us to expand,” she said.

“We have two men who are quite compatible in personality to be able to reach out into the community and embrace the community. It’s an exciting time.”